


I Can Hear The Sirens

by ftm_loverboy_lance



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Anorexia, Child Abuse, Childhood Sexual Abuse, Daddy Kink, Disabled Character, Disabled Lance, Drunk Sex, Dubious Consent, Eating Disorders, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Extremely Dubious Consent, Forced Prostitution, I'm Bad At Tagging, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Lance is a teenager and Shiro is nearly 30, Lance's family is horrible, M/M, Miscarriage, Multi, Other, Past Child Abuse, Past Miscarriage, Past Rape/Non-con, Possessive Behavior, Prostitution, Rape/Non-con Elements, Self-Harm, Smut, Stalking, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Trans Character, Trans Lance (Voltron), Trans Male Character, Underage Drinking, Underage Sex, Unplanned Pregnancy, dont read this story is horrible bye, everyone is horrible tbh, i love writing about my past 10/10, just... all types of abuse, obviously, past pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-05-02 13:02:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19199368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ftm_loverboy_lance/pseuds/ftm_loverboy_lance
Summary: A/N: So originally, I wrote a story (same title) last year and then abandoned it (I'm sorry) so now I'm editing it and stuff and reposting it.Actual story summary: Running away from home seemed like a good idea to Lance, but it was a horrible mistake.***Unfinished. Will not be continued.





	1. Chapter One: How It Started, Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, read the tags.

Lance had stuffed his black satchel with all his essential items; he had a prepared burner phone, a change of clothes, ten water bottles, a fake ID, a hundred dollars in cash, and a large pocket knife. Lance also had all his unnecessary, but very sentimental, items: an amethyst geode, his favorite book, an mp3 player - courtesy of his ex - and his favorite necklace. He locked the satchel with a small padlock before leaving his room, then he made sure his shoes were in his hands and not on his feet as he slowly padded down the creaky stairs.

After silently saying goodbye to his beloved pets, Lance carefully opened the downstairs window and stepped onto the sharp rocks outside. Without making any pained sounds, or causing the rocks to make too much noise, he walked to the end of the driveway before quickly walking down the smooth sidewalk. Once he had reached far enough away, he put his Vans on then quickly sprinted down the sidewalk. Lance didn't stop for anything as he ran as fast as he could. It was still early in the morning and dark out; he blended into the sky with his dark clothes.

After 20 minutes, Lance's body screamed at him to stop running and rest, but he couldn't; he had to leave and he couldn't get caught. No matter what, he couldn't go back to that hell house. Even if the soles of his feet ached and his lungs couldn't take in air properly, he could not stop running.

Eventually, he had to stop; he had been running for almost an hour. His legs were ready to collapse under him and lungs were burning as he took in large gulps of air. He spotted a motel and internally debated on staying there. If they realized he was underage, they would call the cops. He stood a block away, debating as he tried to calm his body down.

Once he could breathe, he apprehensively walked into the motel. He had gotten the money out beforehand and nervously waited for the lady behind the counter to address him. She was reading a magazine, her glasses resting on the tip of her long, pointy nose. She reeked of alcohol and cigarettes, and her lips were bright red, causing her teeth to look even more yellow.

"Yes?" She asked in a grating voice, assessing Lance as she looked down her nose at him.

He took a deep breath, hesitating a little before speaking. "I need one room for a day, only one resident, please."

She didn't care much for him and grabbed a key off a line of hooks, "It's 40 dollars a night."

Lance internally cringed as he placed the money on the counter before taking the key from her. He smiled gratefully at her before making his way to his room. He unlocked the door, placed the key in his pocket, and walked into the room - making sure to lock the door behind him. He placed his bag under the small table in the corner of the room and sprawled out on the bed with an itchy blanket.

Lance allowed himself to rest for nearly fifteen minutes before taking all the necessary precautions. He didn't take anything out of his satchel, for fear of losing or forgetting anything. He made sure the blinds and curtains were completely covering the window. He placed a "Do Not Disturb" sign on his door before locking it and wedging a chair against it, making it harder to open. He checked the locks on the windows, making sure he knew how they worked.

After that, he went into the bathroom with his pocket knife. Carefully, Lance started cutting his shoulder-length hair off, placing the chunks of hair in the toilet. Eventually, he cut his hair as short and even as possible and managed to collect all of the hair in the toilet. He flushed the evidence of his makeover before pulling a grey beanie over his head. He hated the feeling of prickly hair but dealt with it.

Lance stared at his reflection in the mirror, examining his feminine features. He had tried his hardest to change his physical appearance over time. He lost over 50 pounds and never went in the sun, so he was now extremely, sickly pale, instead of his normal tan. He never let people photograph him, except for last year's Christmas party where he was dark brown like everyone else in his family, and nearly 60 pounds heavier. He only managed to keep the weight loss a secret, sometimes nearly caught when his face started changing. He mainly kept it a secret by wearing layers of bulky clothes and making sure people saw him eating.

He decided to change into the clothes he brought. It was a pair of pastel blue joggers and a white sweatshirt, something Lance's parents weren't even aware he owned because he wore all black. He carefully folded his clothes so they fit in his satchel, placing them on top of everything else. He was wearing a binder, and his beanie made him look more masculine; in fact, he looked more masculine than ever before in his life.

Inevitably, Lance got restless and wanted to venture outside. He took his satchel with him and slightly wandered around outside the motel. Lance was enjoying the cold fresh air; winter never brought snow here out in the desert, but it still got pretty chilly. He looked at all the individual stores before seeing a laundromat; he made a beeline for it, and silently walked inside, going to the very back where there was a free washing machine. He mindlessly unfolded his clothes before tossing them inside; every item was black so organizing wasn't needed. When he was finished, Lance leaned back against the machine as it ran, looking at the other people.

There was a middle-aged couple with two small kids and three loads of laundry, the wife had graying hair and wrinkles but was still young. There were a handful of people spread out around the laundromat by themselves, minding their own business. A man was sitting, alone, and staring right at Lance. He was dressed in dark clothes and his face was obscured by his hood, but Lance could feel his gaze. He tried his best to avoid eye contact or looking at the dark figure at all. He wandered over to the other machines and hit the "coin return" button on every one, collecting them as he went. After roughly five minutes, he emptied every machine and now had enough coins to purchase something from the vending machine so he bought three packs of candy before making his way to the small family.

"Hi," Lance said politely to the wife with kids, "can I?" he gestured to the candy, hoping she would understand what he meant; he didn't feel like talking.

"Oh, thank you. That's very kind of you," she smiled and gratefully took the candy before handing it to the kids.

Lance beamed when he saw their excited faces; he knew that a laundromat isn't very entertaining so he was glad that he could pacify them for a little while. They both thanked him before he walked back over to his own machine. He felt eyes on him as he slowly nibbled on his own candy; it unnerved him and made his hair stand up. Still, Lance would not make eye contact so he passed the time by eating his candy. The washing machine stopped around the time Lance threw away the wrapper. He carefully moved the wet clothes to a dryer before starting it.

He noticed that the time was 8 am, when Lance usually went to school, and anxiety coursed through him. He willed time to go faster so he could go back to hiding in his motel room, where he could pretend the outside world didn't exist. He's so focused on his thoughts that he doesn't notice the man standing next to him until he touches Lance's arm, trying to get his attention. Lance nearly jumps out of his skin and lets out a soft yelp, causing the man to chuckle at him. Lance glares at him before checking his clothes, willing them to be dry already as he pointedly ignores the larger man. The clothes are still damp so Lance starts the dryer again, and he decides to address the man when it's clear he won't go away. 

"Do you want something?" Lance asks him curtly, too annoyed to be shy right now. 

He shrugs and walks away, grabbing his clothes before leaving; Lance shrugs off the encounter and waits the ten minutes it takes for his clothes to finish. He folds them carefully before placing them back in his satchel and drinks one of his waters as he's leaving the laundromat. Immediately, he goes back to his motel room; taking the necessary precautions before he decides to take a nap.

* * * * *

Lance finally woke up 12 whole hours later; he blames his sleep deprivation for the length of his "nap". He waited for the grogginess to go away before getting out of bed. He drank a bottle of water to make his hunger pains go away, but they are replaced by nausea afterward. With shaky hands and unsteady feet, he attempts to venture outside, going to the nearest grocery store.

He slowly walked up and down aisles, trying not to faint or get too dizzy, before deciding what to get. He grabbed a small bottle of orange juice for the sugar and a calorie-free energy drink. Lance attempted to walk to the cashier but ended up too dizzy to walk; he was using too much of his scarce energy. He could feel his heart racing, beating abnormally as he began to pitch forward. Two strong arms wrapped around his thin waist kept him from face planting onto the tile.

The person who grabbed him slowly guided Lance to the floor to sit down before crouching in front of him. His vision was too blurry to see who it was, but he could tell the voice was a man's. The deep voice was ushering him to drink something and he did so blindly, tasting the sweet orange juice that he grabbed earlier. Some part of his brain was glad that it wasn't something else, something sinister, but the rest of his brain was just happy that it was some form of sustenance.

Lance closed his eyes and waited for his body to start processing the sugar; meanwhile, the man continued crouching down and watching him. After 20 minutes of silence, Lance felt okay enough to stand again. This was when he realized who the man was, it was the same man that stared at him in the laundromat. He pushed the man away before backing up, trying to get as much distance from him; his anxiety spiking wildly. 

"Are you following me?" Lance said in a strained voice, anxiety, and fear causing his heart to race again.

The man held his hands up in surrender, one holding the empty orange juice bottle, "I just happened to see you faint, that's all."

Lance squinted at him, not sure if he should trust him, "Why are you in a grocery store with no items then?"

The man chuckled, "All I came for was beer, I hadn't made it to that aisle yet."

Lance harrumphed, mumbling a "sure" before he turned to walk away.

"You should eat more. Also, do you want your energy drink?"

Lance held his tongue and stalked back to the man before taking the empty juice bottle and his Monster from him. He was about to walk away, again, when the man grabbed his wrist. The man could feel Lance's wrist bones, even through the sweatshirt fabric.

He attempted to speak in a concerned, but in a not condescending voice, "You really should eat."

Lance scowled and the man interrupted anything he was about to say, "I'll pay for the food. Please eat."

After careful consideration, and returning hunger pains, Lance reluctantly agreed before walking along the aisles once again. He spent a long time accessing every food's nutrients and prices as he attempted to make conversation with the stranger.

"What's your name?"

"Shiro. Yours?"

He paused before answering honestly, "Lance."

Shiro chuckled at Lance's food choice, it was a pint of ice cream. It was healthier than normal ice cream; it had a low sugar and fat content but was high in protein. He deduced that Lance had a sweet tooth but didn't comment on it.

"Why are you being nice to me, Shiro?" Lance asked as he paid for the food.

"I'm a generous man," he said with a smile.

Lance and Shiro left the store together then parted ways. Shiro gave Lance his phone number in case he needed help again. Lance wasn't sure if he would end up asking him for help, he felt it was unfair for someone to pay for another person's things. Lance ate his ice cream as he leisurely walked back to the motel. He was throwing away the empty carton when he felt eyes on him; he hoped it was nothing and went back to his motel room. He locked himself inside his room and read his book, waiting for when he was inevitably forced to leave the room.

* * * * *

The knock came around 5 in the morning. Lance was not asleep but he still glared at the door. It was too early for him to figure out where he was going to stay next. He slowly shuffled to the door before unlocking and opening it. He was greeted with the lady behind the counter, she was wearing the same lipstick as the last time he saw her. She informed Lance that he had to leave before the next guests arrived, around 7 am.

Once she left, Lance decided to shower in the motel room's cramped bathroom. As per usual, Lance roughly scrubbed his skin until it was pink and raw. He dried himself with a towel the motel provided before getting dressed in his now clean clothes. He decided to forgo his beanie this time but pulled his hood up to cover his hair. He double and triple checked all his items before taking out his phone, he dialed the number Shiro gave him and listened to the line ring.

"Hello?" a deep voice asked.

Lance got nervous and hesitated to answer, it took him five minutes to say the words, "Hi, this is Lance."

"Oh, hi! I didn't expect you to call so soon."

"Yeah... I kind of need advice, I need a place to stay."

"I see. I can help. Do you want to meet me somewhere to talk?"

"Sure," Lance answered apprehensively; Shiro's cheery voice made him somewhat suspicious for some odd reason. 

"There's a diner near your motel if you want to meet there. I'll buy you breakfast."

Lance agreed to meet him in half an hour before hanging up. It took him a moment to realize that Shiro shouldn't have known about the motel he was staying at but he shrugged it off. He checked his belongings again before he left the motel room, making sure to leave his key at the counter. Then Lance slowly walked along the sidewalk to the diner to meet Shiro. Again, he felt eyes on his back, which caused his hair to stand on end but he tried to ignore the unsettling feeling.

* * * * *

Lance sat in the corner of the establishment, watching everyone else. He had his legs drawn up to his chest with his chin on his knees. He got judgemental stares, but he didn't care, he was comfortable. Shiro was running late, so Lance resumed reading his book. Meanwhile, a pair of dark grey eyes were watching Lance.

The bell above the diner's door dinged as Shiro walked in, and the noise caught Lance's attention. He looked up at Shiro before respectively setting his novel aside. Shiro sat down across from Lance, wearing a black suit and smiling kindly. The suit slightly amused Lance, but he avoided commenting.

"'Morning. I'm sorry I was late."

"It's okay, I got to read my book," Lance tapped the book's cover and smiled.

Shiro returned the smile. "So, have you had time to decide what you want for breakfast?"

Lance shrugged before playing with the diner's laminated menu, fidgeting. "I guess I'll have scrambled egg whites and a coffee."

Shiro chuckled and called the waitress over, telling her their orders. The older man wanted a similar meal, but with toast and regular eggs. Anyone else would have preferred ordering for themselves, but Lance didn't mind. He was timid, to the point of not being able to talk to cashiers or waiters.

"So," Shiro started, getting the smaller boy's attention, "you need a place to stay?"

"Ah, yeah. I don't have enough money to stay somewhere, and I have nowhere to go, so I'm kinda stuck."

"I could help pay for a motel or hotel," Shiro offered.

Lance's eyes widened before he frantically shook his head, "No! You shouldn't waste money on me!"

"It wouldn't be a waste," Shiro said simply.

Lance shook his head again, "I can't let you spend money on me like that; I didn't have any intention of taking your money."

"You could work for me, or you can stay with me, and clean as a way to repay me. How about that?"

"I don't know... I don't know you well enough, Shiro. I can't just live with a complete stranger, and I don't even know what your job is."

Their conversation stalled when the waitress came over with their food. She set each item down in front of them before asking, "Is there anything else you two need?"

"Do you have sugar-free coffee creamer?" Lance barely managed to ask the waitress, his anxiety during social interactions was horrible.

"We don't, sorry."

"Oh, that's okay. What about skim milk?"

"We do have skim milk, I can bring you a cup."

"That would be great, thank you," he replied with a smile.

Lance added a calorie-free sugar substitute to the hot beverage while he waited patiently for his milk. Shiro took note of how the younger boy wasn't eating his food. Instead, Lance's attention was on his coffee. After the milk arrived, he gradually began adding it to his beverage, testing its taste every so often. He decided it was adequate when it became a pale shade of beige. Lance occasionally took small bites of his food, eating at a very slow pace. By the time Shiro finished his food, Lance had only finished a third of his.

They spent a little less than an hour in the diner, then sat for a while in Shiro's car, discussing what they would do about Lance's homelessness. They decided that Shiro would pay for a motel room for Lance, and then Lance would eventually find a way to pay him back. It wasn't a perfect plan, but it would do. He didn't fully understand why Shiro was helping him, but for the time being, he wasn't going to question it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the original version, if anyone wants to read it. https://archiveofourown.org/works/14494284


	2. Chapter Two: How It Started, Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for dubious consent/sex while intoxicated.

Over two weeks had passed, and Lance still didn't have a way to pay Shiro back. He had calculated the amount of money the older man was spending on him, and the number made his head hurt. He spent every day trying to find a job, but he wasn't old enough to work anywhere. Shiro, of course, reassured him that it wasn't necessary for him to pay the money back, but Lance was insistent. He didn't know Shiro's motives, he always said he was just being generous or changed the subject, but Lance hoped that his motives weren't nefarious.

It was nearly lunchtime and Lance was wandering the streets nearby his motel, looking at the individual establishments. He noticed a brick building tucked behind a hotel and a fast food restaurant. It was a club, a strip club, judging by its vulgar name. It didn't have someone guarding the door, probably because of the time, so he waltzed right in. The bar was dark and slow music played, there were only three people inside. Two were men, and one was a woman - she was the drunkest.

"Can I get you anything?" The bartender asked, eyeing him, most likely trying to determine Lance's age.

Lance knew he looked a lot older than he was when he presented as a girl, which is why he wore feminine clothes, put on makeup and didn't wear his binder today. Hoping he didn't look too young, he simply stated, "I'm looking for a job."

"What's your name?"

"Lana," he lied.

The bartender took one look at Lance before making a decision, "You can be my new barback. Right now, there's no clean up so you can restock the storage room."

Lance didn't question that the bartender didn't ask his age or information, and accepted a clipboard from him. The clipboard had all the items needed, and how much of it was needed. His job was to make sure every item on the list was there, and record the quantity.

"If you have any questions, ask me."

Lance nodded before leaving his locked satchel behind the bar, per the bartender's instructions. He entered the storage room that attached to the bar and began to quickly, but carefully, restock. Over the span of 20 minutes, he recorded all the bottles of liquor and managed to place them on the shelves they belonged on. Once every box was empty, he collapsed them, placing them in a pile before he checked the information he recorded.

"I'm finished," Lance told the bartender before placing the clipboard on the counter.

There was only one man in the bar, so the bartender left him to check on Lance's work, "Stay here. If he bothers you, yell."

"Okay," Lance replied with a small smile.

He checked the items the bartender had behind the bar, mentally taking note of what needed replacing. He needed to replace the napkins, get more clean rags, and replace a bottle of scotch and a bottle of Jack Daniel's. The ice also looked as if it was running low, but he didn't know if he was strong enough to carry one of the bags of ice. He also needed to get clean shot glasses.

"You did well, I'm proud," the bartender said as he returned, snapping Lance out of his thoughts.

"Thank you," he replied, then quickly added, "some things need replacing, shall I?"

"Yes."

Lance came back with everything that needed replacing, except for ice. Then, without instruction, he put the empty bottles in the recycle, the dirty dishes in the sink and rags in a basket where the rest were. After he finished, the last customer was gone and his skills impressed the bartender.

"I'm impressed," the bartender admitted, "have you worked in a bar before?"

"No, I'm just good with organization and multitasking."

"So, I'll pay you in cash. I can't pay a teenager legally, after all," the bartender said as he leaned against the bar.

Lance's eyes widened as his anxiety skyrocketed. "I'm sorry-"

"If anyone asks, you just turned 21," the bartender interrupted with a knowing smile.

Lance nodded before he realized, "I never learned your name."

"Jinx," he said simply as he began wiping down the counter.

Lance nodded before taking the opportunity of an empty bar to clean. He wiped down every piece of furniture, swept, and then mopped. The next person to arrive was at 2 pm, the floor was dry by then and the bar actually looked clean. Again, he impressed Jinx but he didn't comment on it.

Around 6 pm was when the bar got busy, and the strippers started dancing. Lance was constantly moving. He was sweeping broken glass, replacing things behind the bar, preparing drinks when Jinx got too busy, cleaning spills, and many other tasks. He worked from 11 am to 5 am with only one break. Throughout that time period, multiple people flirted with him, and there was one fight. By the time he got back to his motel room, Lance was exhausted and starving.

* * * * *

Lance had been working at the bar for a week. He was doing great, in his opinion. Lance was able to work with Jinx and do what was needed without being asked. The only downside was the fact that men continuously hit on him. Occasionally, some would even grope him or try to do worse. Jinx or the security guard always helped him, but he still hated it. He also hated the never-ending misgendering, even if he chose to present as a girl.

Today, Lance got paid for the first time. He estimated he would get paid roughly 300 dollars, maybe more for tips. It was 1 am, the strippers had left and Lance was cleaning the bar. It was empty and closing in an hour, so he didn't pay much mind to the new patron who walked in.

"Hey, there. What can I get you?"

"One club soda."

Lance's head immediately turned at the sound of a deep, familiar voice and made eye contact with dark grey eyes. Shiro. What was he doing here? He didn't tell him he was working here. The older man smiled at him, and Lance hurriedly finished his tasks before going over to him.

"What are you doing here?" Lance whispered as he wiped down the bar, hoping Jinx couldn't hear.

"My friend told me about this gorgeous girl named Lana at a nearby bar. Are you Lana?" 

Lance's face turned red, and Shiro smirked at him.

Jinx leaned over the bar to whisper to Lance, "Is this guy bothering you?"

"No. I think it's time for my break?" Lance asked nervously.

"Go, it's not busy, and you've worked hard."

Lance smiled gratefully at Jinx before grabbing Shiro's wrist and dragging him outside. The older man chuckled, and let Lance lead him to the alley behind the building.

"Again, what are you doing here?" Lance asked with a high-pitched voice.

Shiro crossed his arms defensively, "I was worried about you. This is a shady business with lots of perverted men. And I know for a fact that you are not old enough to work here."

The two had never discussed his age before, but the older man knew that Lance was probably a teenager and nowhere near old enough to work at a place like this. 

"How old are you, anyway?" Shiro added before Lance was able to respond. 

Lance ignored the question, sighing as he responded, "This was the only place that would hire me and as long as I look old enough, it's fine. And I am fine. You don't need to worry about me."

The older man sighed, "Fine, but call me if something bad ever happens."

Lance nodded with a mumbled "yeah" before turning to go back inside.

Shiro stopped him with his hand on his shoulder before asking, "So why does everyone think you're a girl named Lana?"

Lance didn't answer, he shrugged off his hand and walked back inside the bar. "My break's over and I have work to do, you should leave."

Shiro sighed and followed him back inside. He tipped heavily before leaving, telling Lance before he left, "Call me in the morning."

Lance sighed heavily before addressing Jinx, "I'm sorry to ask, but can I leave early today?"

"Sure, you've already completed everything anyway."

Lance beamed and grabbed his satchel, kissing the bartender's cheek before running to the door, yelling over his shoulder, "Thank you! I'll come in early tomorrow for the delivery and even do inventory."

Jinx chuckled, a faint blush dusting his cheeks, "It's fine. Have fun."

Lance dashed out of the building and thankfully saw Shiro's SUV pulling out of a parking space. He waved frantically at him, and the car pulled up next to him. He opened the car door before carefully climbing inside; Shiro turned on the heat when he noticed Lance shivering slightly.

"Where to?"

Lance smiled shyly, searching the older man's face for anger as he responded, "I kinda want those super cheap gas station slushies."

Shiro smiled, "Okay, then."

He drove them to the nearest gas station, and, with no regard for safety, Lance jumped out of the car as soon as it was parked. He skipped into the convenience store, with Shiro following, and got a diet coke slushie. Of course, the older man paid, and that's when Lance remembered that he forgot he was supposed to get paid today. Oh well, I'll just remind Jinx in the morning, he thought. He slowly drank his slushie and held the large styrofoam cup close to his chest.

Slowly, the small boy wandered aimlessly around the tiny store. He smiled at Shiro when the man stood next to him. He was eyeing all the sweets in the aisle but refrained from asking for anything.

"What food places do you think are open?"

"McDonalds, probably. And a few other fast food places."

Lance scrunched up his nose then said with a whine, "I want some real food, though."

"We could go to my place and I can make you something," Shiro offered, a gleam in his eye that Lance didn't notice, too busy looking at all the food. 

Lance's interest peaked, he still hasn't seen Shiro's house and he was very curious so he agreed, "Sure, why not?"

Shiro smiled and lead the way out of the convenience store, holding the door for Lance. He let the petite boy get into the car by himself because it amused him. Lance was short so he needed to jump a little to get into the car. They drove for over 20 minutes, which Lance found odd, especially when the surroundings became neighborhoods instead of businesses. He originally thought Shiro lived in a hotel, apartment, or some other temporary residence like he did.

They drove past the suburban neighborhood, and into an area with large, green fields. Lance was about to ask Shiro where they were going before he spotted a large mansion, which they headed towards. his jaw dropped when Shiro opened the gates in front of the house by entering a pin into a keypad located outside the car window. He then pulled into the driveway and turned the car off before chuckling at Lance's expression.

"This is your house?" Lance asked in disbelief, his voice rising in pitch. 

"Yes," Shiro said simply before exiting the car.

Lance rushed to leave the car as well, fumbling with the seatbelt, "But- You used the laundromat?"

"I was helping out a friend," he replied with a noncommittal shrug.

Lance nodded before staring at the mansion's exterior, which caused the older man to chuckle again. Shiro grabbed his small hand and lead him inside for a tour of the house.

It was three stories tall with a basement, 6 bedrooms, and 7 bathrooms. The top floor had a panoramic window, which was bulletproof glass, and contained a living room with two guest bedrooms. The second floor had two master bedrooms, one was Shiro's and the other was ignored. The other two bedrooms were converted into studies and, again, one was Shiro's but the other wasn't mentioned. The first floor had a large dining room, another living room with a large couch, and a game room that had a liquor cabinet, along with other things that would entertain most men. The basement was locked, and Lance was informed that it was just for storage when he tried the door.

Lance couldn't stop fawning over everything. He grew up poor due to his large family and had never seen such extravagance. Shiro was very amused at Lance's childish excitement but made no comment. Half an hour after they arrived, a few minutes after the tour was over, Lance's hunger pains returned.

"Shiro?" Lance asked timidly.

"Yes?"

"I'm hungry."

Shiro gestured to a stool behind the island, "Sit."

Lance nodded and obeyed, sitting on the stool Shiro pointed to.

"So, what do you want to eat? Something sweet, as usual?"

"Fruit. Anything you have, but preferably cut up."

Shiro chuckled and proceeded to prepare some fruit. He placed cut up strawberries, cubes of pineapple, whole grapes, and cubes of watermelon in a large bowl before handing it to Lance. The younger of the two took the bowl gratefully before nibbling on the pieces of fruit. Shiro couldn't help but compare him to a bunny because of how he ate. Lance saw the older man staring at his lips while he ate and tried to ignore it, a nagging thought at the back of his head.

The pair decided to watch television while Lance ate his fruit. Around halfway into the second episode, he fell asleep. Shiro turned off the tv, put the bowl used for fruit in the sink, and got a blanket for Lance. He covered the small boy with the downy blanket, his gaze lingering a little too long before he left to go to sleep in his own room.

* * * * *

Two months had passed, and over time, the two had developed a routine without realizing. Lance would wake up at 9 am every day, he would get ready for the day, then Shiro would drive him to work around 10:30. Lance would work from 11 am to 5 am, and Shiro would pick him up when he got off work. He had grown more comfortable with the older man, so he now lived in his house and felt no need for his old motel room.

Meanwhile, Lance was still losing weight. He didn't eat when he worked, which meant he went 18 hours of the day without eating. Outside of work, he only ate a meal replacement drink, and whatever Shiro convinced him to eat. He has gone days, maybe a whole week, where he didn't eat a single solid food. Shiro was worried, Lance was getting even paler, and when the two hugged, the older man could easily feel the boy's hip bones pressing against him. 

Lance wasn't worried, though. He had lost half his body weight but he wished he could lose more. He was underweight but all the bad parts of his body remained from when he was overweight. Specifically, the feminine parts remained. Lance still had fat on his hips, his chest wasn't affected much by the weight loss, and even his menstrual cycle was regular. The patrons at the bar always saw Lance as a woman, even when he wore masculine clothes and did not wear makeup. He knew that the femininity was mainly due to his genetics, height and body type but he still hated it.

Today was a normal Monday, although it was nearing Valentine's day and pink was everywhere in stores. Shiro had made breakfast for Lance before giving him a ride to work. Surprisingly, the boy ended up eating all of his breakfast and he seemed to have more energy. Shiro was hoping today would be a good day.

Those hopes were crushed when Shiro picked Lance up from work. The boy was drunk and squashed between two large men, their hands were wandering all over his body. Lance didn't seem to mind, he had a smile on his face and a light blush on his cheeks. Anger bubbled in Shiro's chest and he made a move to stop things before they escalated. He grabbed one of the men's wrists and pinned his arm behind his back before threatening him and shoving him away. The other man stayed then Shiro glared at him and he slowly backed away from the drunk, younger boy.

Lance pouted and whined, "Shiro, why'd you do that? We were having fun."

The older man bristled and pulled Lance close to him. "You shouldn't let people touch you like that."

"Why?" Lance asked with an innocent, although slurred voice.

Shiro didn't reply, instead, he led the drunk boy outside to his car. He opened the passenger door and helped Lance inside before getting in himself. He locked the car doors before addressing the slightly sober boy, who was playing with his jacket sleeves.

"Why were you drinking?"

Lance shrugged, "Because."

"Because, why?" Shiro asked in a stern voice, his voice getting a little louder. 

"It was there and I was sad," He replied softly, a few tears welling up in his eyes.

Shiro sighed and Lance mumbled an, "I'm sorry" as he continued playing with his sleeves.

"It's fine, just don't do it again," Shiro said curtly before starting the car.

Lance nodded and rested his forehead against the cold window, closing his eyes. He opened them again when the car came to a stop and Shiro exited the car. He smiled a little when the man came over to his side to help him get out of the car. Lance wrapped his arms around Shiro's neck as he was carried into the familiar house. Shiro attempted to lay the drunk boy down on the couch but he wouldn't let go of him, arms wound around his neck.

Lance pulled the man closer to him before gently kissing him, inexperienced lips pressing against Shiro's. The older man reciprocated the kiss as Lance pulled him even closer until he was laying on top of the smaller boy, between his legs. Neither pulled away from the kiss and Lance opened his mouth to submit. Shiro's tongue swiped over Lance's parted lips and tasted the alcohol he drank earlier before delving deeper into Lance's mouth. The younger of the two moaned quietly around the intruding member, before wrapping his legs around Shiro's waist.

The older man slowly pulled away from Lance's mouth as he tries to think through his lust, "We shouldn't do this."

Lance pulled the older man as close as possible to him before whining, "Why not?"

"You're drunk and underage. This is wrong," Shiro replied, not entirely convincing himself.

Lance kissed Shiro's jaw as he began unbuttoning his pants, "I know you want to and so do I. Please, Shiro."

Shiro groaned and sat back on his heels as he took off his shirt and pushed down his pants enough to free himself. Lance took the opportunity to wiggle out of his pants and underwear but left his shirt on. Shiro didn't comment on his insecurity but kept a mental note of it. He leaned over Lance again and repeatedly nipped at his neck, enjoying the breathless sounds Lance made. Lance whined when Shiro didn't do anything further after a few minutes. 

"Please touch me," Lance asked as he involuntarily squirmed.

Shiro chuckled and ghosted a hand over the area between Lance's thighs, barely touching him. The smaller boy whimpered and bucked his hips towards his hand, seeking more stimulation. Shiro gently delved into Lance's folds, immediately feeling the wetness that was starting to drip from Lance. He teased the boy by merely ghosting his fingers over the slick flesh; this resulted in high pitched, breathless whines that grew louder the more Shiro teased him.

"You're so needy and wet," Shiro teased as he pushed a finger into Lance, who moaned softly. "Do you think about this often? Me playing with you?"

Lance nodded before mumbling, "M-more, please."

Shiro chuckled as he pushed a second finger into the dripping boy, moving them in a circular motion to stretch him out. Lance bit his bottom lip to muffle his sounds and Shiro kissed him hard. Their tongues mingled and Lance moaned into the kiss when a third finger was pushed into him. Shiro slowly but roughly thrust his fingers into Lance, enjoying the broken moans that left Lance's lips.

Shiro slowly pulled his fingers out of Lance, causing the boy to whine, before he asked him, "Have you done this before?"

Lance blushed and shook his head warily, hoping Shiro wouldn't change his mind and stop. 

Shiro hummed in reply before positioning himself at Lance's entrance, teasing Lance by sliding his tip along the folds. "Are you sure you want this? We can stop now."

Instead of answering verbally, Lance moved his hips so Shiro's tip was pushed into him. Shiro groaned and refrained from roughly pivoting his hips. Instead, he slowly pushed himself into Lance until all of him disappeared into the boy. Shiro let him get used to the feeling while Lance was letting out small, breathless sounds. Once the slight pain subsided, Lance began to squirm, moving his hips slightly to get some stimulation.

Shiro gently played with the boy's clit as he slowly rolled his hips, eliciting more broken moans and needy whines. Lance moved his hips in time with Shiro's and repeated "more" as tears welled up in his eyes. If Shiro didn't know better, he would have stopped, but he knew the tears were from overstimulation. Instead, he did exactly what Lance asked, he slowly began pivoting his hips. Tears began flowing down Lance's face as his whole body tensed, tightening around Shiro and causing him to groan.

Lance came first with an obscenely loud moan then the tension drained from his body. He relaxed into the couch as Shiro continued to thrust into him, chasing his own orgasm. When Lance sensed Shiro getting close, he kissed his jaw and whispered, "Come inside me, please."

The words alone were enough to make Shiro come as his hips stilled. He then collapsed onto Lance, who hugged the larger man and played with his hair. Shiro kissed Lance's neck and held him close. They eventually fell asleep like that with Shiro still inside Lance.


	3. Chapter Three: How It Started, Part Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally, this chapter was a lot more smutty but I felt like it was too much filler so I rewrote the whole thing, basically. Now there's a lot more angst :)
> 
> TW - more dubious consent/non con

Shiro awoke alone while it was still dark out, the spot on the couch next to him was still warm so he figured that Lance went to the bathroom or to take a shower. He closed his eyes again and fell back asleep within five minutes.

Shiro awoke again an hour later, still alone on the couch. He sprang upright when he realized that it was dawn and the spot next to him was now cold. He got up and started looking for Lance, wondering where he could be.

Eventually, after searching through the house, he found Lance asleep in the guest bathroom; he had taken a bath and was so exhausted that he fell asleep in the water. Shiro carefully picked him up and laid him down on his bed, before drying him off.

He sighed, half talking to himself as he dried off the smaller boy's skin, "Silly boy, you could have drowned. You should have at least told me you were going to take a bath so I could check on you."

He tried not to stare as he noticed a plethora of jagged lines covering his stomach, from his hips to just under his ribcage. Stretch marks. They looked like too many to just be from growing or weight gain but he didn't want to assume anything and it wasn't his business anyway. He also noticed that his arms were covered in straight lines, from his wrist all the way to his shoulders; he never saw Lance's bare arms before and was shocked by them because he knew exactly what the lines were from.

He finished drying Lance off and covered him with a blanket before going to the second floor, and going into his study.

* * * * *

Lance woke up a little after 9 in the morning. He stretched out on the bed before getting up and putting his clothes on, all black like usual. He made his way downstairs, getting an apple from the fridge and slicing it into sixths.

He nibbled on one slice as he called out, "Shiro?"

He heard footsteps upstairs before a voice called out from the stairs, "Yeah?"

Lance sat down on the couch, bringing his knees up to his chest; waiting until Shiro sat down before saying anything.

"I'm sorry."

"What for?"

Lance played with his sleeves anxiously, "Um, what we did. I'm a minor so you could get in trouble for what we've done. All because I was... Ahem, you know."

Shiro leaned forward to kiss Lance's cheek, "I wanted it too, it's not your fault. And to me, your age means nothing. I've wanted you from the day we met."

Lance blushed and nuzzled Shiro's neck, "Okay."

Shiro pulled Lance onto his lap, causing the smaller boy's face to turn bright pink. He laid his head on Shiro's shoulder and hummed quietly.

After a few moments, Lance spoke, "Shiro?"

"Hm?"

"Did you see me naked?" Lance asked nervously as he worried the fabric of his shirt.

"Yes, why?"

Lance paused and didn't respond, anxiously picking at a thread on his shirt.

"What's wrong?" Shiro asked as he rubbed Lance's back.

"I have," Lance paused before mumbling, "boobs."

"I'm aware of that."

Lance nodded and kept messing with his shirt.

Shiro sighed and gently took a hold of Lance's hands, "Your body doesn't affect the way I see you, or how attractive you are to me. You are a boy, and I will always see you as one. And you don't have to wear the binder around me if it's uncomfortable."

"I'd rather wear nothing. A binder is no more uncomfortable than a bra; everything is uncomfortable when you're my size," Lance stated simply, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

And he was correct. In his size, everything is uncomfortable. He wore about a 30G, which would be considered huge by some people.

They sat on the couch in silence for half an hour, watching TV. Shiro slipped his hand under Lance's shirt, putting his hand on the smaller boy's hip, gently squeezing it and feeling the bone underneath.

"What are you doing?" Lance asked shyly, squirming away from his touch.

"Nothing," Shiro said as he ghosted his fingers along the stretch marks. "How did you get these?"

Lance hesitated a moment before mumbling, "Pregnancy."

"I thought you were a virgin?" Shiro asked, moving his hand away from Lance's hip, squeezing his upper thigh instead.

Lance played with his sleeves again, "I've never... Not consensually, not until you."

Shiro's brows knit together as he frowned. "Do you-"

"Have kids?" Lance interrupted before pausing, "No. None of them made it."

"How many?"

"I lost count."

"Wow."

"Yeah. I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"Making you uncomfortable."

"I'm not uncomfortable, darling. It makes me upset that anyone would hurt someone as beautiful as you," Shiro explained as he pulled Lance closer.

Lance nodded and closed his eyes, planning to just rest until he had to go to work.

* * * * *

Two days later, Valentine's day rolled around and Shiro would not let Lance leave the house; he wanted to spend the whole day together. Since Lance got drunk, they hadn't had sex but Lance was wary that Shiro would want to. He was feeling very apprehensive about having sex again, even though he really wanted to.

"I have work," Lance whined as he tried to get out of bed but was dragged back by one of Shiro's arms; he had taken off his prosthetic before going to sleep the previous night.

Shiro chuckled, "Come on, call in sick. I have all of your favorite foods and snacks."

Shiro, of course, got what he wanted and the two spent the entire day in bed. When it was dinnertime, Lance was asleep so Shiro had to wait until he awoke. He didn't have to wait long since Lance had sleeping problems, he couldn't sleep for longer than 3 hours at a time. He carefully lifted the half asleep boy and carried him downstairs.

"I need you to keep your eyes closed while I get your present ready," Shiro instructed with a soft but stern voice when they reached the bottom step.

Lance nodded and closed his eyes, "Okay."

"Good boy," Shiro praised as he set Lance down on his own feet.

The boy kept his eyes closed and listened to the sounds of rustling. When Shiro allowed him to open his eyes, Lance was dumbfounded by all the things Shiro got him. There was sushi, his favorite food that he only got on birthdays, his favorite candies, and other foodstuffs he loved. He knew for a fact that sushi was expensive, and so were his favorite chocolates.

"Shiro, you didn't have to do all this..."

"I wanted to," Shiro said as he sat down on a stool at the island and pulled Lance onto his lap.

"Still, I can't pay you back..." Lance said as he leaned over the island to look at all the items.

"You don't need to, I already have you," Shiro stated truthfully, staring at the butt directly in front of his face.

"That's sweet, but still."

Shiro shrugged and carefully got up to put all the refrigerated and frozen foods away, leaving out only the sushi.

"There is a way you can return the favor," He stated as he opened the container for the sushi and sat back down.

Lance hummed quietly, "What would that be?"

"This." Shiro pulled Lance's hips down so the boy would sit back down in his lap before gently rubbing the area between his legs.

Lance blushed before shaking his head, "Let's just eat dinner."

Shiro chuckled and continued to rub between the smaller boy's legs, "Okay, eat your dinner."

Lance managed to eat half of the sushi before getting full. He squirmed off of Shiro's lap then put the rest of the sushi in the fridge. As he was closing the fridge door, the older man came up behind him, pressing himself against Lance's back and wrapping his arms around him, one hand on his hip and the other between his legs.

Lance's face flushed, "Shiro- N-no."

The older man chuckled and turned the smaller boy around, kissing him hard. Lance returned the kiss, his face flushing more and a whine rising in the back of his throat. Shiro pushed down his pants, hands gently squeezing and kneading the soft flesh of Lance's ass. The older man lifted the petite boy before laying him down on the couch, peeling off his clothes.

Lance whined loudly and shook his head as he spoke, "Shiro...-"

The older man kissed Lance, swallowing his words and noises as he buried himself deep inside his wet heat.

* * * * *

Lance was allowed to go back to work the day after Valentine's, but only after Shiro had spent the whole night leaving him sore and full of cum. The soreness and the reason behind it made him extremely upset. He couldn't understand why he was so upset over nothing; Shiro didn't hurt him, he just wanted his own Valentine's day present. Shiro seemed very caring and nice, so Lance didn't want to believe that he was trying to hurt him. And Lance enjoyed it so Shiro obviously wasn't hurting him, Lance was just confused about what he wanted.

After work, Shiro was running late so he stayed and talked to Jinx, enjoying a free glass of wine, or three.

Lance was finishing his third glass when Jinx asked, "Do you want to go somewhere? I think a few places are open at this hour. 

He hummed in response and stood up, wobbling slightly. Jinx wound his arm around Lance's waist before leading him outside, stopping to lock the door to the bar. Lance made his way to Jinx's motorcycle, the only vehicle in the parking lot. The bartender got on the vehicle before Lance, the smaller of the two wrapping thin arms around his waist and leaning against his back. For the first time in a while, Lance didn't feel eyes on him as they drove away.

They drove for a short while before stopping in front of café attached to a bookstore. They both got off the motorcycle, Lance needing a bit of help from the bartender. They sat in a secluded booth, Jinx got two coffees while Lance laid his head down on the cool wooden table. 

"Lightweight, huh?" The bartender chuckled as he set the coffees down.

Lance smiled a little, "Just feel like shit."

Jinx sipped the black coffee while Lance added multiple packets of creamer and sugar. 

"Want to talk about it?"

Lance hummed in reply before changing the topic, "What kind of food do they have here?" 

"Lots of baked goods, donuts, croissants, scones, muffins. Things like that."

Lance felt a pang of hunger but didn't want to ask for anything.

"Do you want something to eat, Lana?" 

"No, it's okay."

"Come on, just one thing that you really want," Jinx said with pleading eyes. 

Lance giggled and mumbled, "Well, I've actually never eaten a donut before." 

The bartender's eyes widened, "Really? Never? Everyone's eaten a donut at least once."

Lance shook his head, blushing a little, "I was never allowed to eat them." 

The bartender chuckled and got a basic circular donut with chocolate frosting for Lance, and one with jelly filling for himself. Lance tore off a small piece and started nibbling on it, testing the taste. Surprisingly, he loved it but he could feel the grease; immediately feeling guilty for eating something so unhealthy and calorie-laden. 

"Well?" Jinx asked as Lance tore off another piece and ate it.

"It's yummy," The smaller boy giggled. 

Jinx smiled and then started eating his own, a little proud of himself. The two sat together, eating, sipping coffee and talking about things that didn't really matter. Eventually, they made their way into the bookstore, Lance's eyes alight with excitement as he looked at all the books. He flittered from aisle to aisle, picking up the occasional book to look at. He didn't keep any but over ten caught his interest. Jinx couldn't help but love Lance's wide smile and excitement every time the small boy picked up a new book. 

* * * * *

By the time they had left the establishment, it was an hour until they had to go back to work so they decided to take a coffee each to go before heading back. Between the two of them, they had drank six cups of coffee. 

"Sorry for wasting so much of your time," Lance apologized as the two of them got onto the motorcycle. 

"No worries. I enjoyed our little 'date.'"

Lance flushed a little and didn't respond, wrapping his arms around the man's waist before they took off. They arrived at the bar 30 minutes later, the ride taking twice as long because of traffic. When the motorcycle stopped, Lance immediately felt eyes on his back and then noticed the SUV parked outside the bar; it was still running. A minute later, after Jinx went into the bar, Shiro stepped out of the car and stalked over to Lance.

"Where were you? I was worried," The older man said as he grabbed Lance's wrist tightly.

Lance stiffened, feeling his heart race as he panicked; fear began to build up inside him for an unknown reason, "You were late and... Jinx took me on a little date?" 

The older man scowled as he hissed, "A date?" His grip tightened on Lance's wrist as he spoke, sure to leave a bruise.

"C-coffee! Just coffee," Lance whimpered, trying to pry his arm away.

Shiro glared and his grip tightened even more before he let go of Lance and stalked back to his car. He got into the large vehicle and started to drive away.

He stopped next to Lance and rolled down his window to speak, "Don't fucking do that again. I'll pick you up later." 

Lance nodded and the car drove away. He felt tears building up in his eyes and rubbed his aching wrist, willing the pain away, willing the encounter to be his imagination. He crouched down and wrapped his arms around his legs as he started sobbing. Jinx came outside looking for him after fifteen minutes had passed. He found Lance rocking a little and sobbing.

"Hey... What happened?" He asked gently as he sat next to the boy, rubbing his back.

Lance shook his head and slowly stood up, making his way into the bar to do his job. The older man frowned but followed him inside. The day was the same as usual, strippers and drunk patrons, some too handsy but no huge or dramatic scenes. After work, Lance waited outside for Shiro to pick him up, and the two drove home in silence. They arrived at the house and Lance went upstairs to go to sleep, followed by Shiro, who didn't listen to "no" again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder if this will make anyone mad since I made Shiro seem really good before. but this is how I'm gonna keep it for now bc everyone in this is supposed to be at least a little horrible.


	4. Chapter Four: Nightmares

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW, of course. Read the tags. 
> 
> Also, I posted the half chapter today bc I was stuck by writer's block, then of course, it was gone and I got motivation to finish after I posted. so here's the full chapter.

An entire week had passed since Shiro's outburst, with no sign of another one; he didn't even raise his voice once at Lance. Lance had hoped that it was a one-time thing, just a momentary slip. A moment where Shiro forgot to control his anger.

It was an early Saturday morning, Lance was attempting to sleep because he knew it would be busy at the bar today, as all weekends were. Unfortunately, he couldn't rest. Every time he managed to slip away into sleep, he had horrible nightmares; past memories haunting his sleep. Meanwhile, when awake, his own brain kept him from sleeping; thoughts racing.

He laid in bed, wondering how things were back at home. Did his family even care that he was gone? All he was good for was cooking, cleaning, being a punching bag, and being a living sex toy. His father probably only cared because he didn't have someone to use for relief, and had to find someone else. Lance hoped against hope that his father wasn't replacing Lance with one of his siblings, they were all too young to have to deal with that. Not that that ever stopped his father, Lance thought bitterly.

The first time Lance's father hurt him, the first time Lance found out what things were really like in life, was when he was three years old. He doesn't remember what happened, just what he's managed to salvage from flashbacks and hazy memories. He remembers pain and blood, his father on top of him, his father bathing him after the fact. Since Lance was three, that act of cruelty and perversion was just a facet of his life.

Lance shook his head before getting out of bed and getting dressed. If he couldn't sleep, or get the thoughts to go away, then he would preoccupy himself. He skipped downstairs before finding Shiro in his study, rapping his knuckles against the doorframe.

"Hey," he spoke softly when Shiro's eyes landed on him.

"Yes?" The older man responded as he closed his laptop, then gestured for Lance to sit on his lap.

Lance hummed, hoping he wasn't coming off as annoying, "Let's go somewhere, I'm bored."

Shiro chuckled and squeezed the smaller boy's hip, "Can't. I have too much work to do since I have to leave for a business trip tomorrow morning."

"What..?" Lance asked quietly, having heard of this for the first time.

"Yeah. To a different state. Gotta kiss up and shit. I'll be gone for a week."

Lance hesitated before speaking, knowing he would sound selfish, "How will I get to work? Or even get into the house, I don't have keys or anything."

Shiro shrugged noncommittally, "I could give you money to stay at the motel again if you want to forgo the luxury of living in a house. Or, I could leave you with the keys, and you can ask your friend for a ride every day. What was his name? Jinx, or something ridiculous like that."

Lance ignored the comment about his boss and smiled at Shiro, "Whatever you think is best."

The older man nodded before grabbing a cell phone from his desk and handing it to Lance.

"Here. It's a cheap burner phone, I bought it for you. Use it to call your boss."

Lance froze, hesitating from taking the phone and accepting the strings attached.

"This is a gift, so take it. You really should learn to accept gifts more often."

Lance nodded before taking the phone and kissing the older man's cheek.

"Just don't flirt with him or go anywhere with him. To the bar and back, okay?" Shiro said in a stern voice.

Lance nodded again, "Okay, but I think I'm going to work early today, it's going to be busy. I'll ask my boss for a ride since you're busy. Is that okay?"

Shiro nodded, already opening his laptop again. Lance went back to his room, rummaging through his things to find the paper he wrote his boss's number on. He called the number, hoping he didn't get it wrong.

"Hello?" Jinx's voice came from the phone.

"Hey, it's Lana. I was wondering if I could get a ride? If not, that's okay."

"Yeah, it's fine. What time?"

"Uhm, right now? If that's okay, of course."

Lance could hear Jinx smiling as he responded, "It's perfectly fine. Send me the address you want me to pick you up at."

Lance hummed in response then Jinx hung up. He sent the address before slipping his phone into his jacket pocket. He grabbed his satchel and headed downstairs, grabbing a water bottle from the fridge.

* * * * *

A little while later, he got a text from Jinx, saying he was outside the house. Lance went upstairs to say goodbye to Shiro, kissing him on the cheek before going outside. He carefully climbed onto the motorcycle, wrapping his arms around the older man. He felt eyes on him and looked up at the study window, where Shiro was looking down at them. Lance waved at the man and smiled before talking to Jinx.

"Wanna go to the café again?" Lance asked, voice hopeful.

"Sure, baby," Jinx responded before starting to drive.

Lance flushed, his cheeks now ruby red as he tightly held onto the older man. When they arrived at the café, Lance's blush had finally faded. Jinx led the petite boy inside, his large hand on Lance's bony hip. The two sat down in the same booth as last time with a coffee each.

Jinx looked around the room conspiratorially before taking a flask out and pouring a liquid into his coffee.

Lance gasped before slapping the man's hand and scolding him, "Jinx! Stop it, that's bad! And you're my ride!"

He chuckled and stirred the drink before sliding it over to Lance, "Try it."

Lance eyed the drink before taking a sip of it, finding it surprisingly sweet, but it was definitely alcoholic.

"What is it?" He asked, contemplating taking another sip.

"Bailey's. It's chocolate and whiskey. Do you like it?"

Lance hummed and sipped from the cup as he responded, "Yes, but none for you. You're driving, and I don't feel like dying."

* * * * *

By the time the two decided to go into the bookstore, Lance was giggly and already getting tipsy; he had only drank two cups of coffee, both spiked with alcohol. The older of the two grabbed Lance's butt when he bent down to pick up a book.

Lance squealed before giggling and scolding the older man, "That's not nice! You're not supposed to do that, you perverted old man."

"I'm not that old," He responded, taking mock offense.

Lance giggled again and poked his cheek, "I bet you're more than twice my age, you dirty old man."

"I'm only 30," He responded, nipping at Lance's finger.

The younger boy pouted and pulled his hand back, "Yup, you're more than twice my age."

"Wait. How old are you?"

"Too young for you to be perverted towards me. And don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to."

Lance giggled and skipped away before Jinx could respond, leaving the other man exasperated.

* * * * *

A few hours later, Lance took his break after working for nine hours. He knew he shouldn't, but he decided to walk around the block. He breathed in deeply, letting the cool night air into his lungs. When Lance got back from his walk, the bartender was waiting for him.

"Hey. Enjoy your break?"

"Yeah. It's cold outside; I love it."

Jinx chuckled, "So, I wanted to talk to you about something."

Lance probably looked terrified because Jinx immediately added, "It's not bad, don't worry."

Lance attempted a small smile, "What is it?"

"I just wanted to say that, if you feel uncomfortable with me flirting with you, then I'll stop."

Lance hummed and started cleaning the bar, "It's fine. People have done worse things to me than grabbing my butt and calling me pet names."

Jinx nodded, and Lance left the bar to clean elsewhere. He wanted to ask what Lance meant, but didn't, not wanting to press the matter even more.

* * * * *

Lance was finally done with work and waited as Jinx locked up the bar. The sky was a soft, hazy blue at this time, and Lance couldn't help but gaze at it, his head tilted back. He slowly closed his eyes, feeling the gentle wind blow against his face. He took a deep breath, inhaling the crisp air before sighing heavily. When he had finally opened his eyes, he noticed Jinx looking at him and blushed faintly.

"Your eyes are the same color as the sky," he paused as he stepped closer to Lance, "they're very beautiful."

The smaller boy's cheeks became a darker shade of pink, "Thank you."

The older man flashed a bright smile and kissed one of Lance's pink cheeks, causing them to darken even more.

"Let's go to my place; you said that your boyfriend - or whatever he is - is out of town, so why not?"

Lance shook his head as he stifled a yawn.

"Just wanna go home and sleep?"

The younger boy nodded, and the two of them got onto the motorcycle, driving straight to Shiro's mansion. When they got there, Lance could barely keep his eyes open and mumbled a goodbye to Jinx. The younger boy went inside, leaving his shoes and satchel by the front door before going upstairs and crawling into bed fully dressed. As he drifted off to sleep, he could have sworn he saw Shiro walk past his open bedroom door.

* * * * *

Lance woke with a start, less than an hour later. His heart was pounding, and his chest was too tight, he was unable to breathe. He tried to calm down, willing the panic attack to go away.

"It's just a nightmare," he said to himself, repeating it like a mantra. 

Once he calmed down and the panic dissipated, he started sobbing. Sleep deprived and emotionally tired. All he wanted was sleep, and he didn't care how he got it. Without thinking, his brain muddled by sleep and too emotional to think rationally, he dialed a familiar number on his phone. 

After one ring, a voice that haunted his nightmares came through the phone, "Hello?"

Lance froze for a moment, his voice refusing to come out.

"Lance, is that you?" The voice asked.

Lance's voice immediately became childish against his will as he responded, "Don't tell papa." 

"I won't, I promise. Tell me where you are."

Lance managed to get out the address before he froze again, and the line went dead. He rushed downstairs and flung the front door open before standing in the doorway, and watching the street.

Over an hour later, a luxury car came within Lance's view, and he tried not to fling himself towards the car. A stocky man stepped out, his skin color similar to what Lance's was like before he became sickly pale. His eyes landed on Lance, and a broad smile spread across his face. Lance rushed towards him, jumping onto the man. He easily caught Lance and held him up effortlessly. 

"Hunk," Lance said breathily as he buried his face in the larger man's neck; his voice still sounding childish. 

"My sweet pet," Hunk replied, his large hand rubbing the back of Lance's head, "I missed you."

Lance nodded, and the larger man continued to speak, "Why'd you run away? If you needed somewhere to live or some money, you could have asked me."

The smaller boy shook his head, and mumbled, "You would have told papa."

"I don't give a shit about your dad, and I wouldn't have if you asked me not to." 

"Promise?" Lance asked, his voice hopeful.

"I promise, little pet. And the girls miss you, it's been a couple months since you last saw them. You missed their birthday." 

A pang of guilt hit Lance in the chest, and he started crying again, "I-I'm sorry."

"It's okay." 

Once Lance started to calm down, Hunk asked, "I know you called me for a reason, what was it?"

"I can't sleep; need my pills."

Hunk smiled as he spoke, "I have your pills at my house. Come home with me."

Lance shook his head, "This is where I live now."

"Just for a bit, my pet. I'll give you some pills, and you can take a nap. And then I can take you to see the girls. How does that sound?"

Another pang of guilt hit Lance in the chest, and he nodded, "Okay. But only if we see the girls, and you don't tell papa."

"I promise."

Hunk climbed into the car with Lance still attached to him like a koala. The front door was still open, and the younger boy was barefoot.

* * * * *

They arrived at Hunk's house an hour later. Lance knew his way around the house and made his way to his room, followed by Hunk. He stopped in front of his old dresser, still filled with Lance's clothes, and a safe was in the bottom drawer. Hunk unlocked it and pulled out the pill bottle with Lance's sleeping medicine. 

"Don't take it all at once," The large man warned as Lance's fingers wrapped around the plastic.

"That happened once."

"Last year. It happened once last year. That's why your father made you live with him again, you know." 

Lance nodded, a whimper escaping his throat as he responded, "I know. I'm sorry."

Hunk kissed Lance's forehead, resting his chin on the smaller boy's head as he spoke, "It's okay. Go to sleep, little pet."

"Lay with me? Just until I fall asleep?" Lance asked as he took two pills and laid down.

Hunk joined the small boy on the bed, pulling him close. Lance rested his head over the large man's heart, listening to it beat as he willed his body to stop shaking in fear.

* * * * *

Lance awoke nearly eight hours later as he felt two small bodies crawling over him. A smile overtook his face as he opened his eyes to see his two daughters smiling at him. He hugged them to his chest and combed bony fingers through short curls. 

They were identical twins and had just turned one on Valentine's day. They both had short, large curls, and their skin tones were the same as Hunk's. They had Lance's blue eyes, and the rest of his facial features, like his nose, and mouth shape. 

Lance smiled at Hunk, who stood in the doorway of the smaller boy's room. He motioned for the larger man to sit with them, and kissed his cheek when he sat down.

"Their adoptive parents let you bring them here?" Lance asked as he continued combing through curls.

Hunk nodded, and chuckled, "Probably wouldn't have let me if you weren't here."

"They don't like you," Lance said softly.

"I know, and they probably shouldn't. I don't like them either."

Lance frowned, "Why not?" 

"You're their mother, you should be raising your daughters. They shouldn't."

"They're good parents. She's a stay at home mom, and he's a doctor. And I'm not a reliable mother, you know that. I'm depressed and sick; sometimes I stay in bed for days. I can't take care of one baby, much less two. We both know that I can't take care of Annabella and Isabella." 

"He's ancient, and she's half his age, yet they don't like me for being older than you. You could be a more reliable mother if you took your medication, and if you let me help raise the babies, but you won't. You don't trust me."

Lance wanted to yell, they'd had this fight before. But he didn't want to yell in front of his daughters so he didn't say anything at all. Hunk sighed and kissed Lance on the cheek.

"They don't like you because they know what you did to me," Lance mumbled, hoping the larger man couldn't hear him. 

Hunk rolled his eyes and whispered in a harsh voice as he grabbed Lance's bicep tightly, "I only did that because the only worth you have is your body; the only thing you're good for is sex. Your father dumped you onto me when you were a small child. He said you were useless, and that he'd give you to me if I sold you like all my other boys and girls, and gave him a percentage. You were my highest earner until you had your daughters, then you decided to give them away. You can't even be a decent mother. You really are good for nothing." 

Hunk got up off the bed, scowling as tears welled up in Lance's eyes. The small boy set his sleeping daughters down on the empty spot next to him and sobbed, curling up into himself as the larger man left the room. He cried himself to sleep, and when he woke up again, his daughters were gone, most likely with their adoptive parents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments are welcome. 
> 
> also, there's a lot of referenced stuff here. and I'm sorry for anyone who loves Hunk.


	5. (not a chapter) Information and stats.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm struggling with some major writer's block and felt guilty about not planning on uploading this week so have some character stats!

Lance - 13 years old, 4'6 and around 70 pounds; he lacks muscle mass but has a considerable amount of fat for his weight. He's naturally very tan with brown hair, but his skin is currently sallow and he has prominent dark circles. Although born female, Lance is his actual name. 

Shiro - 25 years old, 6'6, closer to 200 pounds and very muscular; in other words, twice Lance's size. He's not extremely pale, but not very tan because he prefers to stay out of the sun and doesn't expose much skin. Same hair and prosthetic arm as in the beginning of the show. 

Hunk - actual age unknown, most likely in his 30s, 5'10, close to Shiro's weight; he has a very broad bone structure and retains muscle easily, as well as fat. Has tan skin and brown hair, like Lance; implied that they are from the same ethnic background. Almost all personal information is unknown; Hunk is a nickname that Lance gave him because he doesn't know his real name. 

Annabella and Isabella - identical twin daughters of Lance and Hunk, 12 months old. Small for their age due to being born prematurely. They were adopted by a couple, and Lance is only allowed to see them if Hunk permits it. Other than that, not much is known about them. 

Jinx - 30 years old, 6'4, between 160 and 180 pounds; not as muscular as Shiro or Hunk, very lanky. Lightly tanned skin, worse dark circles than Lance, shoulder-length black hair. Lives alone and lacks a social life; he doesn't have many friends and doesn't go out much because of his job. Not much is known about his personal life or family, unknown if his actual name is Jinx or if it's an alias. 

Lance's immediate family - almost completely unknown. Lance has a father and multiple siblings, but that is it.

Kuro - hasn't been introduced yet so I won't be putting any info here except that he's Shiro's identical twin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want any more info (provided that it doesn't have spoilers), or if you just wanna talk, then contact me on Twitter/CuriousCat. My twitter is @ftm_loverboy and my CC is @ftm_loverboy_lance.


	6. Chapter Five: Lies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A tiny bit of smut, a lot of angst.
> 
> TW for dubious consent (somnophilia)

After Hunk had taken Lance back to Shiro's house, Lance proceeded to crawl into bed, and not leave for as long as possible. As he took two of his sleeping pills, he paid no mind to the fleeting thought that he had left the front door wide open, but had found it closed when he returned. Instead, more pressing thoughts disturbed him; the conversation he had with Hunk on the way back repeating itself in his mind.

* * * * *

"Hey," Hunk said as Lance started to get out of the car, "The guy you're staying with, you said his name is Shiro?"

Lance nodded, sleep clouding his brain and altering the sound of his voice, "Yeah. Why?"

"As in, Takashi Shirogane?"

Lance nodded again.

"Tall, short hair with a little white tuft in the front?"

Lance was about to sigh before realization dawned on him, his stomach doing flips as he spoke, "Wait... How do you know him?"

Hunk leaned in close, invading Lance's personal space as he spoke, "He's one of my best customers in this area; he has lots of money to spend. Must be why he's interested in you, he probably recognizes you from pictures, and he was the last person to buy you before you ran away. Bet he's not happy about his wasted money."

Lance's stomach lurched, stomach acid threatening to escape his body. He flung open the car door, and scrambled into the house, ignoring Hunk's laughter behind him.

Just before the front door shut behind Lance, Hunk called out to him, "You're just a sex toy to him. Come back to me once he gets bored with you."

* * * * *

Lance spent the week in bed, only leaving when the pressure from his bladder got too painful. He didn't shower, eat, or drink water. He ignored his phone every time it rang until it eventually died. His limbs felt like they were composed of pure lead, and he was sure he had taken enough of his medicine to count as an overdose, if taken all at once. And when Shiro returned on Sunday night, this is how he found Lance; he was asleep in bed, a nearly empty bottle of medication in hand. The older man ignored the slightly strong smell of sweat as he carefully laid down in bed next to the sleeping boy. He pulled Lance close with an arm around his waist until his back was flush with Shiro's chest.

The two slept like that for a few hours, Shiro woke up first, and Lance hadn't moved since the older man laid down with him. He got off the bed, and gently took the pill bottle, reading the information. A small burst of panic shot through him as he considered the fact that Lance might have tried to hurt himself. The frail boy was breathing shallowly, and he had a slight fever but otherwise seemed fine.

Shiro sighed and began to gently disrobe Lance, peeling off his clothes slowly, and setting them aside. He then took off his own clothes, leaving his underwear on before going to the bathroom, and drawing a warm bath. Once the tub was full, he carried Lance to it, sitting down in the water with the smaller boy on his lap. Lance was completely unresponsive, even when Shiro lowered him into the water. The older man washed the thin boy's body; he was as gentle as possible, fearing that even holding Lance too tight would cause bruises. After Shiro was satisfied with cleaning the small boy's body, he began washing his hair. Even though it was short, he washed it twice to get a weeks worth of oil out of his hair.

After Lance was completely clean, Shiro carried him to his own room, setting the still unresponsive boy down on his clean duvet. He tried his best to dry Lance off before tucking him into bed, then took the dirty, sweaty sheets off Lance's bed. Afterward, Shiro went downstairs to get some food, and a couple of bottled waters for Lance to have once he finally woke up. He crawled back into bed with the smaller boy, once again falling asleep with his arm around Lance's waist.

* * * * *

Shiro moaned in his sleep as he dreamt of a wet and tight heat engulfing him. Sleep slowly ebbed away from Shiro's consciousness, and he realized that the heat wrapped around his member wasn't a dream. He opened his eyes to see Lance straddling his hips, Shiro buried deep inside the smaller boy.

"H-hey," Lance spoke, voice shaky, and movements choppy as he rocked his hips.

Shiro sprang up, muscular arms wrapping around a thin upper body, "Lance! What are you doing?"

"Making you feel good...?" Lance spoke, his voice becoming shakier as he stopped moving his hips.

"Why?"

Tears welled up in Lance's eyes as he started to ramble, "I-it makes you happy? And your thing was... You were hard, so I figured I'd make you feel good? Because it's all I'm good for... I'm sorry, I know I'm not very good at it, but I'm just a sex toy, so I figured... That I could at least do this for you..."

"Hey," Shiro said softly as he rubbed small circles on Lance's lower back, "You're not just good for sex; you aren't a sex toy. You're a human being. And you can make me happy in a hundred other ways, you don't have to resort to sexual things. If you really want to, then we can have sex, but if you're just doing this because you think I want to, then we don't have to."

Lance nodded before mumbling, "I just want to make you happy. And you might not think so, but I am only good for sex. I'm a sex toy. And because that's my only purpose, that's what I want to do to make you happy, because if I'm not useful to you in this way... Then I'm not useful at all. So... Can we, please...?"

Shiro sighed, knowing that Lance wasn't going to listen to him. He gently rolled them over, so he was on top of Lance, pressing a quick kiss to the smaller boy's nose before pulling away, and getting off the bed. Blue eyes immediately welled with tears before sobs wracked Lance's small frame. A series of "sorry"s left Lance's lips, repeating over and over. Shiro laid down next to Lance, pulling him close, and pressing light kisses all over his face. They laid in silence until the sobs stopped, Lance's breath coming out in small gasps.

"I love you," Shiro spoke softly, the smaller boy's entire body going still.

"Wh-what?"

"I love you."

The sobbing started again, and the older man tried not to panic as Lance rambled, "N-no you don't. No one loves me. I'm too broken, and used; I'm just a whore. People don't love whores. M-my brain is broken, and it'll never be fixed. And you'll just leave like everyone else because you don't love me. You don't."

"Lance..."

The sobs got stronger, and the smaller boy scrambled off the bed, running into the bathroom and locking the door. Shiro sighed deeply and sat outside the bathroom, his back pressed against the door as he listened to Lance's hyperventilating.

He waited to speak until he heard the sobs and hyperventilating stop, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. Please come out."

There was a long pause before Lance responded, "Did you...- Did you buy me from Hunk? Or was that just a lie he said to get me to leave you...?"

Shiro's confused voice responded through the door, "Buy you? What?"

The smaller boy hesitated before adding, "For sex..."

Shiro paused as realization dawned on him, "God, no. I would never do that."

"H-he said that you bought from him a lot... You bought me from him..."

"He's lying," Shiro responded, voice full of venom before immediately softening, "Please believe me."

Lance didn't respond, and silence engulfed the two of them.

* * * * *

They sat in complete silence for close to an hour before Shiro's phone started ringing. Lance heard the muted conversation through the bathroom door then Shiro called out to him.

"Lance? Baby, I have to go to work. Please come out," Shiro pleaded but Lance didn't move or respond.

After a few minutes, the older man sighed, "I'll try to finish up at work as fast as possible. I have to go. Bye."

Lance could hear the unspoken words, another "I love you" on the tip of Shiro's tongue, but the older man walked away. He didn't leave the bathroom until he heard the front door close and lock and then heard a car drive away. Lance went to his room and started charging his phone, impatiently waiting until it was charged just enough for him to turn it on. He left it plugged in as he called the familiar number again. 

The line was silent for a moment before Hunk's voice came through the phone, "Hey, Lance." 

"Hi."

"Something you want, my pet?"

Lance hesitated before responding, "I need proof. Proof that Shiro was your client."

"I don't have proof."

"I know you keep proof. Please."

Lance could hear Hunk hesitating, so he quickly added, "I'll come back to you. If you show me proof, I'll come back and live with you."

Lance could hear the older man smiling as he responded, "Alright. I'll get some proof. When do you want it?"

"Soon? Less than an hour. If you can't then just hang onto the proof until I can see you."

"How 'bout I just pick you up now? Tell him that you went to work."

"Okay."

The line went dead and Lance left his phone alone to charge. He slowly got dressed, his hands shaking due to a mixture of fear, and a lack of food. After he was dressed, and his phone was charged enough to not die while he was gone, he picked up his satchel and waited on the front porch for Hunk. As he waited, he felt eyes on him, but he couldn't fathom where they were coming from. He looked up at the empty house, and all the windows were devoid of watching eyes, so he shook off the feeling. A luxury car, a different one than last time, pulled up to the house. Lance walked towards it as Hunk opened the door for the smaller boy to get in. He climbed into the car, and it sped away.

"Do you have proof?"

"Some. Not super definitive, but it was what I could get."

Lance hummed so the older man continued talking, "There's a recording of the time he bought you, and his most recent phone call to us, which was just a week ago. I'm pulling up phone records and bank records for more proof."

Lance nodded and closed his eyes as he responded, "Play the recordings."

The first recording started, and a female voice was the first to speak, 'Hello, you have reached The Gilded Cage, how may I be of help to you today?'

'I would like to make a booking,' replied a male voice, an all too familiar one that he knew belonged to Shiro. 

'Will that be a group or individual booking?'

'Individual.'

'At our location, or your own?'

'My own.'

'What location would that be?'

'My house.'

'Are you inquiring after a specific person or any specific body type? In example: hair color, eye color, skin color, male, or female.'

'Lance McClain. I'd like to book him for the night.'

'Good choice, he's one of our best products. The fee is very high, 30,000 for the night and 2,000 per hour.'

'I'm aware.'

'Can I take your name, please?'

'Takashi Shirogane.'

'Oh, Mr. Shirogane. Why didn't you say it was you? I won't bore you with the rest of the specifics. When will you be requiring our services?'

'Tomorrow evening.'

'Alright, someone will bring Lance to your address tomorrow evening. Have a good day, Mr. Shirogane.'

The recording stopped, and Lance kept his eyes closed.

After a moment, Hunk broke the silence, "Do you want to listen to the other recording?"

"No... I don't want to hear it, and I don't need any more proof. He knew who I was, he's always known."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I originally was gonna have more in this chapter but enjoy a cliffhanger!


	7. Chapter Six: Revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter begins about a year and a half after the last chapter ended. Lance just turned 15 in this chapter. 
> 
> TW!!! there is technically incest, so if you don't like that, don't read it. they aren't related by blood, and they're step siblings but they weren't raised together as siblings so its not really incest at all, but some people still don't like it and if you dont like it, don't read it.  
> and because I dont really see it as incest, I'm not going to put it in the tags but I am going to put it in this warning. I might tag later if people ask me to.

Blue eyes slowly opened to blinding white lights, immediately closing again to get away from the harsh brightness. Lance let out a low groan and tried to cover his eyes, but a sharp pain stopped him. After he got accustomed to the lights, he looked at his arm, an IV needle embedded in his elbow was restricting his movement. He looked around the small room, his foggy brain slowly realizing that he was in a hospital room, and the incessant beeping he was hearing was a machine tracking his heartbeat.

As panic raced through him, he immediately started ripping off the wires monitoring his heart and breathing, causing the machine to beep louder. He ripped out his IV before attempting to sit up and realizing something was very wrong. He couldn't move his legs. He could feel them, he could feel the intense bone-deep, aching pain in his hips and upper thighs, but he couldn't move them. His breathing quickened as he started to panic more.

The glass door to the hospital room slid open as a nurse rushed in, her voice soft as she attempted to calm him.

"Lance, do you know where you are?"

"Hospital," he replied, still hyperventilating. 

"Good," she praised as she rubbed his back, "do you know why you're here?"

He shook his head as his breathing slowly evening out, "N-no. Why can't I move my legs?"

The nurse hesitated before speaking in an even softer tone, "You were hurt pretty badly. Your hips were dislocated."

"Will I be able to walk again? Or move my legs?" 

The nurse hesitated again before slowly making her way to the door, "How about I get the doctor, and he can tell you everything you need to know."

Lance didn't respond until panic raced through him again, the nurse about to shut the door behind her.

"Wait-!"

He waited to speak again until the door was completely open, "Do you know where my son is?"

"You haven't been in the hospital long, so he's being taken care of in our daycare center. I can bring him if you'd like." 

"Please..." 

The nurse nodded and left.

The door didn't open again for fifteen minutes until the same nurse came back with a baby in her arms, and a doctor trailing behind her. Lance instinctively reached for his son, and she passed the eight-month-old to Lance, who cradled him protectively. The two adults gave him a moment of silence before speaking. 

"Lance, you were severely injured. Your hips were dislocated; there seems to be permanent damage, but you will most likely walk if you have daily physical therapy. Although, you will be in a lot of pain. And, nearly all your ribs have been broken, you have a few hairline fractures in multiple places - your pelvis, your jaw, and one of your wrists. You're extremely underweight and malnourished."

Lance nodded, and the doctor continued.

"Other than those injuries, which I'll go into more detail if need be, we were told that you were found unconscious and severely beaten. We were told that the men responsible were arrested. One of them being your father, which means that the police and child protective services want to talk to you."

Lance paled, and his eyes went wide. As another panic attack threatened to overtake him, he tried to ignore the conversation, focusing on the baby with milky white skin in his arms. His thin fingers combed through black curls. The doctor stood awkwardly before slowly retreating from the room when he realized that the small boy wasn't going to listen or partake in any more of this conversation. The nurse gently began reattaching the sensors and reinserting his IV. 

"What is it?" Lance asked, gesturing to the needle.

"Saline to keep you hydrated, and pain medication."

Lance nodded, and smoothed soft black hair with his fingers as he spoke, "Will it hurt him? The medicine? I mean, is it okay to feed him if I have that medicine in me?"

"Yes, we made sure that the medicine was safe for breastfeeding and/or pregnancy."

"Thank you. Why am I allowed to have him with me?"

"Given your home situation, we figured that there was no person to contact to watch him."

Lance shook his head, "There isn't..."

The nurse continued, her voice becoming gentler, "We also didn't want to separate you two; child protective services wanted to take him and place him in a temporary home until you left the hospital."

Lance pulled tight smile and let out a dry chuckle, his voice dripping with venom as he spoke, "Let me guess, the psychologist working here took only one look at me, where they had found me, and how I had been treated, and then postulated that I am crazy, and separating me from my baby would have negative effects on my fragile mental state?"

The nurse looked stricken for a moment, "No-"

"It's alright," Lance interrupted, "I know how people see me."

They sat in silence for a moment before Lance spoke again, "They aren't going to take Ren from me, are they? Because of what people did to me?" 

"I don't know. I'm sorry." 

Lance nodded and laid down with the small infant still cradled in his arms. Slipping back into sleep as he subconsciously began shutting away the bad memories and thoughts, locking them away deep in his brain. 

* * * * *

He was awoken by soft, familiar displeased sounds coming from Ren. He slowly sat up, and lifted the tiny baby, smiling gently at him. 

"Are you hungry?" Lance asked in a soft voice as he began feeding him. 

The baby latched on, and began drinking; Lance continued to talk to keep him from falling asleep while eating. 

"You eat so much but you're so tiny. Where does it all go? Huh? There's a little black hole in your tummy where all of my milk goes."

He was interrupted by the sound of the door opening, and he pulled the blanket up to cover his chest as Ren continued to eat. He looked up to see a woman in a pantsuit, who was holding a manila folder. She sat down in the chair next to his bed, presumably to make herself look less intimidating.

"I'm sorry I came at a bad time."

Lance shook his head and pulled a tight smile, "It's okay."

"So, your only guardian was arrested and now no longer has custody of you. Because of this, you will be placed with a new guardian, a next of kin. Which would be your oldest sibling."

"But, my oldest sibling lives with my father. And he's 20; not much of a self-sufficient adult." 

The social worker shook her head, opening up the folder as she spoke, "No. Your oldest sibling lives in the UK currently. He's your step-sibling, and 26 years old."

"I don't have any older step-siblings that I know about." 

"His name is Takashi Shirogane."

Lance froze and started zoning out as the social worker continued; his stomach doing flips and the whole room spinning. He felt like this was some sick joke from the universe; he never knew he had a step-sibling, and definitely didn't know that it was Shiro. 

She kept speaking, oblivious to Lance's internal struggle, "Your father married his mother nearly a decade ago, and while she is deceased, he was legally adopted by your father and is still your father's child. This makes him your sibling and next of kin. He's being provided guardianship of you. If something does occur where he cannot be your guardian, we will have to look for a different person within your family to be your guardian." Her voice trailed off and Lance didn't pay attention to her words until he heard his son's name. 

"As for your son, Ren will be left in your care. We have no plans to separate you. He hasn't been physically injured or neglected, and you've taken care of him by yourself so far, so I can imagine that you'll continue doing a good job." 

He smiled wide and nodded, "Thank you."

She smiled back and got up to leave, "Okay. Here's my card, if you have any questions or concerns at all, please call or text me."

Lance nodded and combed his fingers through black curls as she left. He moved the blanket off of his chest and giggled at the baby still eating, placing his hand on the baby's stomach. 

"Hungry baby, aren't you?"

He heard a soft coo and a small hand grabbed one of his fingers. Eventually, Ren was full and Lance kissed his stomach.

"Was that a nice meal? Is your belly all full?"

The baby giggled and grabbed onto Lance's hair. Lance smiled and gently pulled his hands away before setting him on his lap. He hummed to the baby as he combed his fingers through hair. 

"It's a little boring for you here, isn't it? I'm sorry. I can ask they take you back to the daycare center but I don't want you out of my sight so I'll just sing to you and we'll play."

* * * * *

Lance was being pushed in a wheelchair with Ren on his lap, on his way to the hospital cafeteria. As he went past the nurses' station, he heard a familiar voice and turned his head toward it, finding a tall man with short black hair talking to an older nurse.

"I'm looking for a Lance McClain." 

"Are you a friend, or family?"

"Family. Brother."

Lance asked the nurse pushing the wheelchair to stop before calling out to the familiar voice, "Shiro..?"

The dark-haired man turned around to look at Lance and a smile split his face. Shiro was about to speak when his eyes landed on Ren, his mouth opening but no words coming out. The hand that Lance protectively had on Ren's stomach twitched; wanting to pull his son closer, but not wanting to risk potentially hurting him.

Lance gently asked the nurse escorting him to leave, claiming that he would be alright on his own. The logical side of his brain reassured him that he would be fine out here, where everyone could see them. When Shiro still didn't speak after a few moments, Lance slowly rolled to the chairs that were for family members to wait in. He patted the cushion of the chair next to him, a silent command. While Lance waited for the older man to oblige, he played with the baby in his lap. Ren was standing with each foot on a thin thigh as his tiny hands were being held by Lance. 

When the older man sat down, Lance didn't turn his attention to him. Instead, he paid more attention to Ren, pressing tiny kisses all over his face, which elicited high pitched giggles. Shiro broke the awkward silence first.

"Is he mine?" Shiro asked hesitantly. 

"No," Lance replied curtly, almost immediately.

Surprise visibly washed over the older male, followed by relief. And maybe some disappointment? Lance couldn't be sure.

"Who's is he then?"

"I don't know, " Lance lied, "and it doesn't matter." 

Shiro hummed and reached a prosthetic hand out towards black curls, but Lance slapped his hand away before it reached its target. 

"No," Lance said simply, voice dripping with venom.

Shiro physically recoiled, shocked, "Lance, I-"

Over a year's worth of anger bubbled over inside Lance. His voice raised in volume slightly, becoming more severe but not loud enough to scare Ren. 

"No! You're a fucking liar. You probably knew all this time that you were my brother. And you fucking knew about what Hunk did to me. You're a fucking liar and a terrible person. How long did you want me? When I first met you after running away? When I was a small child? Was that when you decided you wanted to fuck your brother? You're probably a disgusting pedophile. You're never fucking touching my son." 

Eyes wide, the older man struggled to respond; it seemed as though he was warring internally. Lance stared at the buttons on Shiro's shirt, ignoring the eyes on him, especially the ones belonging to the baby in his arms. He knew if he looked into Ren's blue eyes, all his resolve and anger would dissipate. After a few long moments, Lance broke the silence. 

"Well? No fucking response?" Lance asked, voice still dripping venom and hatred. 

Lance glanced up at Shiro's face, immediately taken aback by the tears in his eyes.

"Lance... I never meant to hurt you or make you hate me... I love you, and I just want to take care of you. That's all I've ever wanted, from the moment I met you."

Lance's resolve crumbled before Shiro even spoke. Instead of responding, fearing that his voice would betray him, he continued on his way to the cafeteria. The older man apprehensively followed him, unsure if he was supposed to. 

When they got to the cafeteria, Lance got a fruit salad before pulling his wheelchair up to an empty table. Shiro sat down across from him, stirring sugar into a cup of steaming coffee. The smaller boy paid no mind to the awkward silence, nibbling on fruit and giving a few pieces to Ren. The first thing to interrupt the silence was the ringtone from Lance's phone. He glanced at the screen before smiling and answering.

"Hi," he said in a pleasant voice.

Shiro tried not to eavesdrop, but he could hear a faint voice from the other side of the phone call.

'Hey, baby. Where are you? You're not in your room.'

"Sorry," Lance replied in a soft, apologetic voice, "I'm in the cafeteria."

'M'kay. I'll be there in a second. I love you.'

Shiro tried to fight the expression of surprise creeping across his face, focusing intently on his coffee. The smaller boy hummed in response before hanging up, his face flushing a little when he realized that the older man most likely heard the conversation. They continued to sit in silence, both too awkward and apprehensive to say anything. 

A man came up behind Lance before leaning down into his personal space and whispering in his ear, "Hey, baby, miss me?"

Shiro startled at the sound of an unfamiliar voice. He looked up from his coffee, dark eyes landing on a smile splitting Lance's face as he looked up at a man with long black hair. The unfamiliar man kissed and nuzzled along Lance's neck, uncaring about Shiro watching them. 

The smaller boy giggled and pushed the unfamiliar man's face away, "Jinx, no! Your beard's all scratchy!"

Jinx chuckled and nuzzled the smaller boy's neck more, causing him to giggle louder and struggle more. Shiro caught the other man looking at him; he was glaring, as if to say that Lance belonged to him. 

"Daddy!" Lance whined loudly, a dark blush dusting his cheeks after the word escaped from his mouth. 

Jinx chuckled and finally stopped before pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. He leaned down further, pressing another chaste kiss to the top of Ren's head.

"Have you been good for your mama?" Jinx asked as his tattooed hand ruffled black curls. 

Lance smiled and nodded, "Mhm, he's always good. He's a very happy baby."

"Why wouldn't he be? He has you for a mom."

Shiro couldn't stand watching them interact so sweetly anymore, clearing his throat awkwardly.

"Oh, hi," The other man said, as though he hadn't noticed Shiro was there.

"Hi," he replied curtly, almost angrily. 

Jinx pulled a chair up next to Lance before extracting the baby from his arms; placing Ren on his lap instead. He gently bounced his leg as he held the baby. 

He smiled tightly at Shiro as he spoke, "So, here's the thing. I don't want Lance living with you. And I can take care of him. So how about you go fuck off back to the UK and leave him alone."

"No," Shiro replied without thinking. 

His dark eyes started scanning the visible tattoos littering the other man's body as he spoke again in a harsh voice, "I'm his legal guardian now. And I don't know you at all. I don't trust you."

"Lance would rather live with me."

"Really? Why doesn't he tell me that, then?" he replied, gesturing to the boy who was staring down at his fruit. 

Jinx opened his mouth to speak, but Lance interrupted.

The small boy whined and tugged on Jinx's shirt before mumbling in a childlike voice, "No arguing... Please..."

Shiro really couldn't help but compare the younger boy to a small child, a scared one.

Jinx sighed and kissed the top of Lance's head. Then pulled the boy closer, his free hand on the back of Lance's head. He whispered something in the small boy's ear that Shiro couldn't hear; Lance nodded in reply and shrewd, glaring eyes landed back on Shiro.

Shiro ignored Jinx's glare; he couldn't help but notice how their bodies leaned towards each other, like magnets. Lance nestled his head into the crook of Jinx's neck, and the other man wrapped his arm around the small boy's thin frame. Tattooed fingers traced too visible ribs, trailing down Lance's side. 

Jinx spoke again, his voice softer now, "How about this, Lance can live with you if I live with you as well. You mistreat him at all, and I'll report you. And, I might move out eventually, if I end up trusting you not to hurt him. You refuse, and he won't live with you at all."

Shiro nodded in reply, his eyes focused on Lance's face. His eyes were closed, and he seemed calm, pleased just to be close to Jinx. He wished Lance would be like that with him, and let Shiro hold him. Instead, Shiro disgusted him. Lance hated Shiro.

Jinx's mocking voice interrupted Shiro's thoughts, "Guess you're going to have to baby-proof your entire house before Lance gets discharged from here." 

* * * * *

Two weeks later, Lance had been deemed stable enough and was discharged from the hospital. He was given a wheelchair and a prescription for some strong pain medication. Jinx carried Ren, and Shiro pushed Lance's wheelchair as they made their way to the parking garage. They stopped next to Shiro's SUV, Jinx strapped Ren into his car seat before lifting Lance effortlessly in a bridal position. He didn't put Lance into the car, instead, he spun the small boy around, eliciting loud giggles. 

Shiro couldn't stand to see them be affectionate, instead, he carefully placed the wheelchair in the trunk. Once he finished, he climbed into the driver's seat, and started the car, patiently waiting. After more giggling and a few squeals, Lance was in the car. Jinx tapped on the window, slightly startling Shiro.

He rolled down his window, and the other man spoke, "Lead the way. I'll follow you on my motorcycle." 

Shiro nodded and waited until he heard a motorcycle start before making his way out of the garage.

* * * * *

They drove for close to an hour before they pulled into Shiro's driveway. Lance looked up at the unfamiliar house, which was only one story but still fairly large. He waited until Jinx carried him back out of the car and placed him in his wheelchair again. He rolled down the walkway to the front door, looking back to see Jinx carrying the car seat that had a sleeping Ren in it. Shiro was standing in front of the door, holding the key he had inserted into the lock. An expression that Lance didn't recognize on his face; it looked almost like anger or hatred, yet not quite.

Once they were all inside, Jinx took the sleeping baby into the guest bedroom, leaving the other two alone.

"So..." Lance said, "New house?"

"Yeah. Other one was too big and flashy. And not wheelchair accessible," Shiro mumbled the last statement but Lance still caught it. 

"Wait. You bought a new house because of me?"

Shiro flushed and shrugged, "I had enough money. This one was actually cheaper and it's easier to maintain. And I kind of needed to buy a new one anyway because I sold my last one when I moved to London." 

Lance was about to respond when Jinx came back and ruffled his hair. 

"You need a shower," the older man teased. 

Lance pouted, "You're so mean to me." 

"Sorry, baby," he replied insincerely before picking the thin boy up. 

He turned to Shiro, "Do you have a shower chair?" 

"Uh, no. Sorry." 

"Bath it is, then. Do you have bathtubs, or standing shower only?"

"Guest bedroom is a standing shower and has no soap anyway. Use my shower instead." 

Jinx nodded and carried Lance to the bathroom. Shiro watched them leave before going to his study to do some extra work, passing by the bathroom on his way. He peeked in, seeing Lance being stripped by an already naked Jinx. He could see Lance's entire spine and ribcage, could count each individual rib. He was so thin that Jinx's large hands could nearly encircle his waist. The other man seemed completely unfazed by his thinness, and it almost seemed like he was pleased by it. He ran his hands over the small boy's body, tracing over every visible or jutting bone. 

Lance noticed movement and glanced up at Shiro, making eye contact. The small boy opened his mouth to speak, but instead of calling out to Shiro, he spoke to Jinx.

"You gonna get off first, or are we gonna take a bath?" the small boy asked in a teasing voice.

"Both at the same time?" Jinx asked as he looked up at Lance; Shiro could hear the smirk in his voice. 

Lance lightly slapped the older man's shoulder before chastising him, "Bath only."

The older man chuckled and started running the water for the bath. 

Shiro slowly pulled away from the doorway, going to his study and doing what he was originally planning to: work. 

* * * * * 

Lance woke up for the second time that night because he was unable to sleep in someone else's house. He hadn't gotten much sleep at the hospital either. Using his arms for mobility, he slowly crawled out of bed and into his wheelchair, making sure not to disturb Jinx or Ren. He hummed softly to himself as he slowly made his way to the kitchen. He didn't want to try reaching the mugs hanging above the coffee maker so he washed a dirty one in the sink. He was drying it off when a deep voice startled him, causing him to drop it.

Shiro caught the mug, setting it down on the counter as he spoke, "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you."

Lance mumbled his reply, "H-he's a really heavy sleeper so... Didn't expect anyone to be awake. Why are you awake?" 

Shiro shrugged and changed the subject, "Were you going to drink coffee or tea?"

"What tea do you have?" 

"Just black tea." 

Lance hummed to himself for a moment, considering it before deciding, "Tea, then."

Shiro smiled and began boiling water for Lance's tea.

"Shiro?" Lance asked in a soft voice. 

"Hm?" Shiro replied, not giving Lance his full attention.

"Nothing," he mumbled under his breath before adding, "no sugar or milk, please." 

Shiro nodded and finally diverted his attention back to Lance, who was humming softly to himself, his fingers tapping on the counter. He seemed comfortable in the silence. 

"Hey," Shiro spoke hesitantly, "wanna watch a movie or something?" 

Lance shook his head, "Too loud. Don't want to wake Ren."

"Don't worry, I have headphones we can use."

Lance nodded and followed Shiro into the living room. The older man turned on the TV before turning the volume off and plugging headphones into the controller. He handed it to Lance before going back into the kitchen. The younger boy scrolled through movies before landing on a horror movie, playing it then immediately pausing as he waited for Shiro. 

The older man came back with Lance's tea, handing it to the boy who was already curled up on the black couch. He sat next to him as they watched the movie, but not close enough to touch. At some point during the movie, the smaller boy crawled into Shiro's lap, leaning back against his chest. The older man hesitantly wrapped his arms around a thin waist. A little while later, Lance fell asleep, his face nestled into the crook of Shiro's neck. Shiro managed to fall asleep as well, about half an hour later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if this chapter is bad.  
> I know at least one person will hate me.


	8. Not A Chapter

I've decided not to continue with this story. I don't think it's good for me to write this, mainly because it focuses on my past (which its based heavily on) and brings up a lot of negative feelings.  
Maybe I'll write a happier version of this story, maybe not.


End file.
